House of Cards: Real Life Edition

House of Cards: Real Life Edition

Do you ever catch yourself waking up from a dream and swearing it was real? For all my texting-while-driving people, have you ever looked up from your phone and wonder how you got to where you were without crashing? Or maybe one time you spent all day in your pool then were astonished to find out it was 5:30 P.M instead of noon. These are all tiny tricks the mind plays. Little theatrical illusions which distort reality from fiction.


Well, if you were to tell me right now that I was unknowingly participating as an extra in ‘House of Cards’…I would seriously believe you.


We may all be getting ‘Truman Show’d’. The characters are cast to perfection. A billionaire President who’s only defense mechanism against his own ‘little man syndrome’ is to emasculate others. A Vice President who looks the part of a warm grandpa, until you realize he has a secret agenda to punish gays. Behind the scenes lurks a soulless woman hell-bent on supporting her President; except her true motive lies within personal gains and not sincere jingoism. To add an element of eeriness, a former Big Oil Tycoon sinisterly awaits in the shadows as he is confirmed as Secretary of state. For extra drama a Russian Oligarch and President is thrown into the mix, with all of his vengeful tactics waiting to be deployed. Lastly, a former challenger of the president is featured. Once belittled as ‘Little Marco’, the now devious Senator has a master plan to stop a major conspiracy and finally stick it to the man who burnt him best.

Oh, and who can forget the smokin’ hot First Lady?


Unfortunately folks, this is real life.


In an excellent segment of journalism, Rachel Maddow delineated the connection between Secretary of State nominee Rex Tillerson, Exxon Mobile and the country of Russia. Maddow and her usual crew of erudite researchers dug up some important dirt on Mr. Tillerson. It turns out that our current nominee for America’s top diplomatic position has over 63 MILLION ACRES OF RUSSIAN LAND THAT AMERICA HAS NOT ALLOWED EXXON MOBILE TO DRILL IN.

Reread that.


Due to sanctions placed on Russia by America due to some deplorable actions by the Eastern Superpower, Rex Tillerson and Exxon Mobile never got the chance to drill for oil in Russia. Exxon has been sitting on these 63 million acres of drilling potential for some time now. The only thing stopping Exxon and Tillerson from making literally billions of dollars is a sanction from the U.S government. As Secretary of State, Tillerson could effectively lift those sanctions and allow for Exxon Mobile to rake in the billions they have been patiently sitting on.


How did we get here? The cynic in me wants to write about some farfetched conspiracy theory. It would go something like this:


Putin ordered the hack of the DNC to help Donald Trump get elected. In return, Trump nominated Rex Tillerson as Secretary of State. Tillerson hired Condy Rice as a consultant (actually happened) to vouch on behalf of Tillerson and help him get confirmed. Let us remember, Condoleezza Rice is literally employed by Tillerson to help Exxon Mobile make as much money as possible. Tillerson lifts the Russian sanctions, allowing for him and Putin to make a ton of money. Sure, Tillerson will have to divest from his Exxon holdings and put his assets in a blind trust. But, only a dummy would believe that Tillerson does not have anything to gain from this.


Sorry to disappoint again folks, but that is one conspiracy theory I do not subscribe to. Although it is something Alex Jones and the people at Infowars dream about, I cannot believe in it. Simply put, it is exactly what I labeled it…farfetched. Still, it is something you could imagine becoming the plot of Frank Underwood’s next House of Cards episodes.


Here is a theory I do believe in, however:


Marco Rubio. The man who was virtually nowhere to be seen during the Presidential Campaign is back from the woodworks. Rubio finally thought it would be his time to get the GOP nomination and become POTUS. All he had to do was beat out Grayson Allen’s dad and Jeb Bush. And then came Trump. All of a sudden, Rubio was deemed ‘Little Marco’ and lost all chances of becoming president. Oh, and Trump ridiculed him every step of the way. A guy who had paid his dues to his party was suddenly abandoned by it as gutless cowards such as Reince Preibus refused to stand up for him. Do not fret Mr. Rubio, your day of vengeance of here.


Mathematically speaking, if every Democrat voted ‘no’ on Tillerson’s confirmation, then they would still be short one vote. One Republican will have to vote against Tillerson’s confirmation. That one senator…you guessed it…Marco Freaking Rubio. Watch as Rubio absolutely grills Tillerson during his hearing. In an interview this week Rubio revealed that is he is currently up in the air about voting for Tillerson. After watching his questioning of Tillerson, Rubio’s vote actually appears to undecided. Want my hot take?


Just like Priebus, Rubio has proved to be spineless. Despite all of the personal attacks from Trump and a series of deep, intense policy disagreements, Rubio still endorsed and voted for Trump. He fell in line with Party expectations like the sheep he is. Do I expect Rubio to vote ‘no’ on this confirmation? No. Would I love it if he did? Of course. Still, a gambling man would bet that Rubio is just playing politics here. Tillerson will probably be confirmed, yet Rubio is making Trump sweat and conjuring legitimate dissent against Tillerson at the same time. The odds of Rubio’s vote being the deciding one is little. Consider this ‘Little Marco’s’ attempt to put a stain on Trump’s cabinet before they even take office.


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